Over half of my life I operated not from a perspective of abundance but scarcity. During that time, according to my skewed perception, everyone was a competitor or critic, always judging and potentially threatening, and nothing felt secure. It seemed just when I had something in hand, it would be whisked away. So everything had to be white-knuckled and guarded, whether relationships, status, ideas, or things. But then in 2005, everything changed in an extraordinary season of wonder and transformation I spent perched on a hillside, in a tiny cabin overlooking the Pacific. That painful, beautiful season of contemplation changed my perspective. While I’d spent my life clutching a half-empty glass lest someone try to take it from me, I came to see the glass as miraculously always filled, never empty, just the amount I needed–and ever, reliably so. Where before my eyes had seen only scarcity, I came to see lavish, unexpected abundance. It was a mind-shift that changed everything because I could finally rest and trust and breathe. I knew everything was going to be okay. It always had been.
Though the shift was dramatic, I continued to go into periods of scarcity thinking at times, and still do. I’m not sure we ever complete the sea-crossing to abundance; but instead, weave off course at times—sometimes living in scarcity one hour, in abundance the next…. {Read remainder of article on Patheos HERE.}
This is so beautiful, Tricia. And the invitation to keep making the passage from scarcity to abundance lands so timely for me right now. I've lived much of my life in survival mode and scarcity perspective, particularly regarding money. Last night while making dinner I was thinking about how while letting money flow in has been hard for me historically, letting friendship in has been easy and how most often it's through relationships that everything I need arrives. I think this is more true for all of us than our capitalist hyper-individualistic culture leads us to think, and worth contemplating. It's not a new thought for me, but last night suddenly I could SEE the tapestry of connections and flow of abundance weaving all through my adult life and how well taken care of I have been, even when barely making ends meet. Something shifted in me last night and my own long struggle to survive appeared laced with gold threads somehow. I hope I can nurture that little abundance spark into a growing flame in the days, months, years to come. Meanwhile, what strikes me most as I read your piece is how home holds us and the richness it can be. I too have experienced some homes that saved my life. And having myself fallen in love with both the coastal homes you describe, I'm deeply touched by the beauty of this particular abundance--how a space can hold us and not only shelter us, but bring us home to ourselves.